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Thread: Marketing Spin

  1. #151
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    Quote Originally Posted by Spacedude View Post
    I'm not sure this fits into the "spin" column but wood stud 2x4s are not 2x4s, anymore anyways. I'm sure my fellow lumber handlers here know that that today's 2x4s are really 1.5x3.5s. My old 1910 farm house has the real thing. Not sure when they shrank?
    You could always join the lawsuit:
    https://www.jsonline.com/story/money...ize/405300001/
    I may have many faults, but being wrong ain't one of them. - Jimmy Hoffa

  2. #152
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    I'm going lo cal, low sugar, and as little dairy as possible. I found a non-dairy creamer that fit the bill. It tasted fine... at first. In the middle of my second cup of coffee with it, I thought to myself: "I wonder what is in this?" It's a can of white powdered nothing, I guess.

    I could look at the ingredients, but once I verified that it said "Non-dairy creamer" and not "Titanium White Paint" I figured it was ok.
    Solfe

  3. #153
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    Quote Originally Posted by Solfe View Post
    I'm going lo cal, low sugar, and as little dairy as possible. I found a non-dairy creamer that fit the bill. It tasted fine... at first. In the middle of my second cup of coffee with it, I thought to myself: "I wonder what is in this?" It's a can of white powdered nothing, I guess.

    I could look at the ingredients, but once I verified that it said "Non-dairy creamer" and not "Titanium White Paint" I figured it was ok.
    you could try coconut oil or MCT oil extracted from coconuts in coffee. We do here, the latter is a ketone food. It's said to be good and it costs enough to be good, more than white paint.
    sicut vis videre esto
    When we realize that patterns don't exist in the universe, they are a template that we hold to the universe to make sense of it, it all makes a lot more sense.
    Originally Posted by Ken G

  4. #154
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    There's a home alarm company running TV and radio ads claiming that you can order their system without being placed on hold or having your call directed to "the wrong department." (The horror!)

    That's because the ad doesn't give you a phone number to call, just a website to visit.
    I may have many faults, but being wrong ain't one of them. - Jimmy Hoffa

  5. #155
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    Car commercial: "use every obstacle as an impulse".

    Sounds like a head-on collision to me...

  6. #156
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    ...planting the seeds of road rage,

  7. #157
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    "No other brand of aspirin works better at fighting headaches than <our brand>."

    Of course, because aspirin dosages are regulated, no other brand of aspirin works worse, either. But "our brand is just like all the others" doesn't make for good copy.

  8. #158
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    Thankfully, after being left confused and uninformed for a few months, this week the TV started confirming *again* my lingering suspicion that the number one cause for the cold is the cold virus.

    How-stupid-do-you-think-we-are!

  9. #159
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    Add banner: "20% off on TV's. You still have NaN days."

    "NaN" is the "Not a Number" programming error when you send a text to a variable that expects a value.

  10. #160
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    Yesterday, I saw a TV ad for “detoxifying” toothpaste.

    I guess that sounds more exciting than “cleaning”.


    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
    I may have many faults, but being wrong ain't one of them. - Jimmy Hoffa

  11. #161
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    Quote Originally Posted by Nicolas View Post
    Add banner: "20% off on TV's. You still have NaN days."

    "NaN" is the "Not a Number" programming error when you send a text to a variable that expects a value.
    In my newspaper this morning is an advertisement for a car.

    There are four bullet points, that read:

    * Low kms
    * Feature text here text here
    * Feature text here text here
    * Feature text here text here

    Proof reading has really gone downhill over the last few years.
    Measure once, cut twice. Practice makes perfect.

  12. #162
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    There are whole web pages of ads with Lorem Ipsum for the text.
    Cum catapultae proscriptae erunt tum soli proscript catapultas habebunt.

  13. #163
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    My previous doctor's office maintained, for several years, a web page with lots of John Q. Patient generic stuff left in place from the set-up. Probably still have it.

  14. #164
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    "This is not a typical dating site". Any typical dating site ever.

    "[insert random country here] discovers amazing leaked trick to lower energy bills!" Points to a website that helps you in finding the cheapest energy provider. They're correct though, choosing a cheaper provider lowers your bill. Quite the trick. In [my random country here], the government itself offers this service.

  15. #165
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    Popeye’s, a fast food place, is running a TV ad showing a guy grilling meats and veggies, while a woman walks by asking why Louisiana food is so good.

    The guy responds that “it’s slow cooking.”

    The woman then espouses the delights of Popeye’s fried chicken chunks. They look like they take about thirty seconds to cook.

    They look nasty, but the stuff on the grill looks pretty good.


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    I may have many faults, but being wrong ain't one of them. - Jimmy Hoffa

  16. #166
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    The housing market still is king of the marketing spin.

    It's not a row house, it's a two-facade villa.
    It's not small or dark, it's cosy.
    It's not outdated, it has preserved original elements.
    It's not hideous, it's architectural.
    It's not a renovation project, it's ready to move in after some minor works.
    It's not a renovation project, it's got huge potential.
    It's not a renovation project, it's the ideal blanc canvas to give your own personal touch.

  17. #167
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    It's got huge potential.

    There is an exposed 220V electrical line in the middle of the kitchen.

    How about "It's priced to move", in other words, they can't make the price low enough for someone to buy it.
    At night the stars put on a show for free (Carole King)

    All moderation in purple - The rules

  18. #168
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    It's has lots of charm - It's cutely cramped.

  19. #169
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    Quote Originally Posted by Spacedude View Post
    It's has lots of charm - It's cutely cramped.
    Or it has an excess of one of the flavors of quarks.
    At night the stars put on a show for free (Carole King)

    All moderation in purple - The rules

  20. #170
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    "Convenient to highway..."

    It's at the end of a steep off ramp and gets hit by trucks once a month.

    Information about American English usage here and here. Floating point issues? Please read this before posting.

    How do things fly? This explains it all.

    Actually they can't: "Heavier-than-air flying machines are impossible." - Lord Kelvin, president, Royal Society, 1895.



  21. #171
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    "Close to shopping"

    Or, shoppers will park their cars in your driveway during holiday season.

  22. #172
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    "Secluded location" = You'd better have a Dakar truck if you want to reach it
    "lots of privacy" = we hope you grow your own food, or have a fridge truck.
    "very social neighbourhood" = the neighbours can look straight into your living room, and nobody knowns where one garden ends and the next one starts.
    "scenic views" = the neighbour's Renault Scenic is always parked in front of the house
    "reluctantly selling" = I feel guilty for the buyer...

  23. #173
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    There was just a car commercial on which described an SUV as "aggressively sophisticated". What does that even mean?
    Cum catapultae proscriptae erunt tum soli proscript catapultas habebunt.

  24. #174
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    Quote Originally Posted by Trebuchet View Post
    There was just a car commercial on which described an SUV as "aggressively sophisticated". What does that even mean?
    It means that it looks elegant when the driver forces cyclists off the road.

    Information about American English usage here and here. Floating point issues? Please read this before posting.

    How do things fly? This explains it all.

    Actually they can't: "Heavier-than-air flying machines are impossible." - Lord Kelvin, president, Royal Society, 1895.



  25. #175
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    Quote Originally Posted by swampyankee View Post
    It means that it looks elegant when the driver forces cyclists off the road.
    Maybe it has "bold lines," whatever they are.
    I may have many faults, but being wrong ain't one of them. - Jimmy Hoffa

  26. #176
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    Quote Originally Posted by Trebuchet View Post
    There was just a car commercial on which described an SUV as "aggressively sophisticated". What does that even mean?
    It means the ad folks were playing "spin the thesaurus".

  27. #177
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    Quote Originally Posted by Trebuchet View Post
    There was just a car commercial on which described an SUV as "aggressively sophisticated". What does that even mean?
    It is much better than "passively simple".
    At night the stars put on a show for free (Carole King)

    All moderation in purple - The rules

  28. #178
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    Quote Originally Posted by Trebuchet View Post
    There was just a car commercial on which described an SUV as "aggressively sophisticated". What does that even mean?
    "Bro, have you even read Finnegans Wake?!"
    Calm down, have some dip. - George Carlin

  29. #179
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    Quote Originally Posted by SkepticJ View Post
    "Bro, have you even read Finnegans Wake?!"
    Good Lord, no.

    Information about American English usage here and here. Floating point issues? Please read this before posting.

    How do things fly? This explains it all.

    Actually they can't: "Heavier-than-air flying machines are impossible." - Lord Kelvin, president, Royal Society, 1895.



  30. #180
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    A blood-thinner manufacturer is advertising that 98% of their patients don't experience a clot recurrence.

    Of course, this information is useless without a comparison.
    How do patients taking other drugs fare? How about people who take no thinners?
    I may have many faults, but being wrong ain't one of them. - Jimmy Hoffa

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