View Full Version : How to Boost Your Productivity

Disinfo Agent
2007-Nov-06, 10:55 PM
Study Finds Working At Work Improves Productivity (http://www.theonion.com/content/news/study_finds_working_at_work?utm_source=onion_rss_d aily)

2007-Nov-06, 11:20 PM
In other news, Pope is Catholic.

mike alexander
2007-Nov-06, 11:21 PM
And bear spotted in woods.....

Never mind.

2007-Nov-06, 11:24 PM
"Our findings are astounding: By simply sitting down and doing work, employees can dramatically increase their output of goods and services," said

So that's the secret! Closing BAUT and opening Excel...genius!

2007-Nov-06, 11:30 PM
So THAT'S what I've been doing wrong all these years!

mike alexander
2007-Nov-07, 06:33 AM
I've also noticed that the less noise there is, the quieter things are.

2007-Nov-07, 08:30 AM
...By simply sitting down...Aha! :)

Van Rijn
2007-Nov-07, 08:33 AM
In case anyone missed it, this was from the Onion. I did like their video interview asking car makers when the flying models would be out (that would be "Mean Automakers Dash Nation's Hope for Flying Cars").

2007-Nov-07, 10:01 AM
Speaking of work, I've always wondered who the employees are at the AARP.

2007-Nov-07, 02:19 PM
Speaking of work, I've always wondered who the employees are at the AARP.
They are people who like shouting over the phone.

AARP employee: "Mrs. Smith, this is Sarah and I was just calling to remind you that your AARP membership is up for renewal"
Mrs. Smith: "My A&P membership? I thought that grocery store went out of business."
Sarah: "No Mrs. Smith, AARP."
Mrs. Smith: "What, I can't hear you".
Sarah: "AARP"
Mrs. Smith: "No, I already belong to the AARP".
Sarah: "Yes, your membership expires"
Mrs. Smith: "I'm about to expire?"
Sarah: "Membership is going to expire"
Mrs. Smith: "There's no reason to shout!"