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Buttercup
2009-Oct-29, 03:30 PM
Okay, so I asked my husband to pick up a variety pack of donuts this a.m. He did. Mostly raised donuts.

One of them was a raised donut in a rectangular shape. It had a nice gooey coating of maple icing. I love maple icing and thought that was mine...

...because I'm allergic to chocolate, and that's what covers 2/3 of the pack.

I went back into the kitchen a few minutes ago to have another slice of "my" maple donut bar...and it's gone! :confused: :mad: :cry:

He ate it! :wall:

I can't believe he did that. He's often "reminding" me not to eat chocolate because of the allergy -- and he goes and eats the rest of the MAPLE donut! The only one in the box. :sad:

Maybe he's more passive-aggressive than I'd realized. :rolleyes:

Neverfly
2009-Oct-29, 04:04 PM
You really should have known better than to trust him.

Love and marriage has no hold on donuts, ice cream and Dr Pepper.


It's just a simple rule of life. There are some things in which everyone is to be considered the enemy.

Next time, you had best come up with a battle plan.

Such as licking the entire donut all over right in front of him.

Although if he's a particularly stoic warrior, that alone may not be enough to stop him. Booby traps may be necessary.

Buttercup
2009-Oct-29, 04:10 PM
Neverfly, next time I'm going to take the entire maple donut into my home office. He's not even going to get a chance. ;) And if that fails, out comes the rolling pin: Wham! :lol:

Neverfly
2009-Oct-29, 04:17 PM
Ahh... but planting mousetraps inside jelly rolls is more fun...

pghnative
2009-Oct-29, 04:49 PM
Okay, so I asked my husband to pick up a variety pack of donuts this a.m. ... I'm allergic to chocolate, and that's what covers 2/3 of the pack. :rolleyes:
I'd be more concerned that he picked up a pack with 2/3rds being chocolate --- having 1/2 non-chocolate would have been more considerate.

Buttercup
2009-Oct-29, 05:07 PM
Ahh... but planting mousetraps inside jelly rolls is more fun...

I just might do that. :D


I'd be more concerned that he picked up a pack with 2/3rds being chocolate --- having 1/2 non-chocolate would have been more considerate.

Yeah. Next time I'll go get them myself. :mad: Unfortunately I'm still craving that maple bar all these hours later. :(

I still can't believe he did that.

I just might have to get into his tool shed and "accidentally" loose his favorite wrench or something. :D Lol! (No, I'm not that mean...not yet anyway)

Neverfly
2009-Oct-29, 05:14 PM
I'd be more concerned that he picked up a pack with 2/3rds being chocolate --- having 1/2 non-chocolate would have been more considerate.

It's a ploy...

He's getting even for something, I bet you...

LaurelHS
2009-Oct-29, 05:23 PM
Tim Hortons has Canadian Maple donuts that have maple frosting on top and cream filling inside. Mmmm! :)

Swift
2009-Oct-29, 05:37 PM
I think you should kill him. And the best way is to nuke him from orbit; its the only way to be sure.

Nick Theodorakis
2009-Oct-29, 05:49 PM
Borrow a trebuchet and fling a giant maple frosting-covered pumpkin at him.



I just might have to get into his tool shed and "accidentally" loose his favorite wrench or something


BTW, at first I thought you wrote you would lose his favorite "wench," and why wouldn't that be you.

Nick

Buttercup
2009-Oct-29, 06:09 PM
Tim Hortons has Canadian Maple donuts that have maple frosting on top and cream filling inside. Mmmm! :)

Stop..the...cruelty! You're being very cruel. :p


I think you should kill him. And the best way is to nuke him from orbit; its the only way to be sure.

:lol:


Borrow a trebuchet and fling a giant maple frosting-covered pumpkin at him.

Yeah. A 20-pounder with 500 pounds of tension (or whatever).


BTW, at first I thought you wrote you would lose his favorite "wench," and why wouldn't that be you.

He'd better not have a favorite wench. >;-)

tlbs101
2009-Oct-29, 06:26 PM
Maple bars are my favorite, too!

I don't know what I'd do (with the feeling of ecstasy) with a creme-filled one.

hhEb09'1
2009-Oct-29, 06:34 PM
Okay, so I asked my husband to pick up a variety pack of donuts this a.m. He did. Mostly raised donuts.

One of them was a raised donut in a rectangular shape. It had a nice gooey coating of maple icing. I love maple icing and thought that was mine...

...because I'm allergic to chocolate, and that's what covers 2/3 of the pack.

I went back into the kitchen a few minutes ago to have another slice of "my" maple donut bar...and it's gone! :confused: :mad: :cry:

He ate it! :wall:

I can't believe he did that. He's often "reminding" me not to eat chocolate because of the allergy -- and he goes and eats the rest of the MAPLE donut! The only one in the box. :sad:Wait, it was "another slice"? So, you'd already eaten part of it? Maybe he thought you were done? Maybe he didn't want to waste it? Maybe he didn't want to cut into another? Does he know you like maple, I don't see that in your post?


Maybe he's more passive-aggressive than I'd realized. :rolleyes:Banana, lemon, yellow. :)

Buttercup
2009-Oct-29, 06:43 PM
Wait, it was "another slice"? So, you'd already eaten part of it? Maybe he thought you were done? Maybe he didn't want to waste it? Maybe he didn't want to cut into another? Does he know you like maple, I don't see that in your post?

I generally eat donuts bit by bit, to avoid a sugar rush. This is a habit of mine, which he should be accustomed to (after all these years :rolleyes:). I'm allergic to chocolate, so he knows I need to avoid chocolate (he often reminds me of the allergy as well). And yes, he knows I love maple icing.

If there'd been 2 maple-iced donuts in the box (as is usual) it wouldn't have mattered. But there was only the 1. :wall:


Banana, lemon, yellow. :)

:p

peteshimmon
2009-Oct-29, 09:04 PM
Its mild compared to my experience many years
ago when I ate a jam doughnut.

There was no jam in it!

Memory still rankles. A capital offense!


Please excuse english spelling, too old
to change.

Buttercup
2009-Oct-29, 09:13 PM
My husband's excuse was "You had half of it. I thought you left the rest for me."

:rolleyes:

I had 1/5 of it. And he presumed.

Next time the whole danged thing is coming with me to the office, regardless of sugar-rush consequences.

pghnative
2009-Oct-29, 09:22 PM
My husband's excuse was "You had half of it. I thought you left the rest for me."

:rolleyes:

I had 1/5 of it. .Perhaps he thought it was 60% bigger to start with.

(Perhaps I should have posted that in the "solve a math problem" thread)

kleindoofy
2009-Oct-29, 09:47 PM
... He ate it! :wall:

I can't believe he did that. ...
Maybe it's just his polite way of giving you a hint about how you look in that new dress.

Maybe not.

Buttercup
2009-Oct-29, 09:50 PM
No, no...we're not going to solve this with math. The eye doesn't lie. :p Or mine doesn't anyway -- his does apparently. :rolleyes:

Next time I'm grabbing the maple donut and running to my office and locking the door.

And if he tries to get it away from me, I'll whip out a rolling pin and whamo! Then he will be seeing stars (I'm the amateur astronomer in the household).

cosmocrazy
2009-Oct-29, 10:13 PM
I think you are exaggerating about just how much you actually ate BC :liar:. Now come on you are with friends, you can tell us. Did you have half and leave half in a tempting position that your hubby just couldn't resist? You temptress you..! :naughty: mmmm... :think: I wonder...:D

kleindoofy
2009-Oct-29, 10:25 PM
To be honest, I'm a bit surprised at the number of doughnuts being consumed all in one morning. (Not to mention how they're spelled.)

Not exactly what one calls health food.

Buttercup
2009-Oct-29, 10:26 PM
I think you are exaggerating about just how much you actually ate BC :liar:. Now come on you are with friends, you can tell us. Did you have half and leave half in a tempting position that your hubby just couldn't resist? You temptress you..! :naughty: mmmm... :think: I wonder...:D

:confused: Lol! :)

Nope, I honestly ate only 1/5 of it.

Half an hour later I go back for another slice off the bar ... and the bar's gone, and my husband was out the door 20 minutes prior! :cry:

Buttercup
2009-Oct-29, 10:29 PM
Maybe it's just his polite way of giving you a hint about how you look in that new dress.

Maybe not.

I look fabulous. :D

He'd better think so anyway. ;)


Not exactly what one calls health food.

Got to live a little. Moderation and all that (and thanks to my husband it WAS moderate donut consumption today).

TheHalcyonYear
2009-Oct-29, 10:30 PM
I think you should kill him. And the best way is to nuke him from orbit; its the only way to be sure.
I can't believe that I see someone who warned me about suggesting violence against another would put forward such an idea.:doh:

Just tell the man that marriages are made and broken on the basis of such critical issues!!! :neutral:

:whistle:

Neverfly
2009-Oct-30, 02:22 AM
It doesn't take 20 minutes to eat a donut (doughnut).

TheHalcyonYear
2009-Oct-30, 02:27 AM
It doesn't take 20 minutes to eat a donut (doughnut).
You can't just make an unsubstantiated statement like that here. Where's a study that backs that up. :)

HenrikOlsen
2009-Oct-30, 02:37 AM
Half an hour later I go back for another slice off the bar ... and the bar's gone, and my husband was out the door 20 minutes prior! :cry:
Running after committing the crime. He's obviously aware it was wrong.

Neverfly
2009-Oct-30, 02:43 AM
You can't just make an unsubstantiated statement like that here. Where's a study that backs that up. :)

Bring a box of doughnuts and I'll show ya.

LaurelHS
2009-Oct-30, 03:20 AM
It doesn't take 20 minutes to eat a donut (doughnut).
It might take me 20 minutes to eat a donut. I'm a very slow eater, especially if I'm reading or doing something else while I'm eating. :)

pzkpfw
2009-Oct-30, 03:28 AM
If this is the biggest issue to report in a day, that's not so bad.

dwnielsen
2009-Oct-30, 05:26 AM
Allergic to chocolate?! Your life must be hell.

TheHalcyonYear
2009-Oct-30, 06:57 AM
If this is the biggest issue to report in a day, that's not so bad.
I think Neverfly is evading questions put to him about the 20 minute issue. If he doesn't answer, I think the should be charged with an infraction for evading questions. :whistle:

Neverfly
2009-Oct-30, 07:00 AM
I think Neverfly is evading questions put to him about the 20 minute issue. If he doesn't answer, I think the should be charged with an infraction for evading questions. :whistle:

Do you accept bribes?

Buy ya a doughnut if you retract your demand...

TheHalcyonYear
2009-Oct-30, 07:09 AM
Do you accept bribes?

Buy ya a doughnut if you retract your demand...

Yeah, I want 4 angel cream with maple frosting.



Edited to add:

Seriously you have nothing to worry about. I'm a trouble maker that the mods never listen to anyway. :)

Neverfly
2009-Oct-30, 07:25 AM
Yeah, I want 4 angel cream with maple frosting.
You got it.*


Seriously you have nothing to worry about. I'm a trouble maker that the mods never listen to anyway. :)
They listen to me, they just never agree with me.

But I have high hopes that they will come to their senses someday.





*Allow up to 6 months for delivery. Consume at your own risk.

sarongsong
2009-Oct-30, 07:49 AM
My husband's excuse was "You had half of it. I thought you left the rest for me"...Wot?!---he dared return without a replacement donut?
The man is clearly suicidal! :lol:

HenrikOlsen
2009-Oct-30, 07:55 AM
They listen to me, they just never agree with me.

But I have high hopes that they will come to their senses someday.
And stop listening? :whistle:

Neverfly
2009-Oct-30, 08:13 AM
And stop listening? :whistle:

Eh... Close enough.

The Backroad Astronomer
2009-Oct-30, 08:13 AM
And stop listening? :whistle:
That would be a step in the right direction.

Spoons
2009-Oct-30, 08:49 AM
Was there a prenuptual agreement? Did he enter the marriage with this doughnut?

I'm concerned - I've seen civilisations toppled over less.

I left my last partner when she ate the last rice cake.

cosmocrazy
2009-Oct-30, 09:12 AM
To be honest, I'm a bit surprised at the number of doughnuts being consumed all in one morning. (Not to mention how they're spelled.)

Not exactly what one calls health food.

How about the Homer Simpson way - Doh:doh:nut..

pghnative
2009-Oct-30, 12:59 PM
I left my last partner when she ate the last rice cake.I consider eating the last rice cake to be a sacrifice.

Spoons
2009-Oct-30, 01:03 PM
You are one of these soldiers of fortune I have heard so much aBAUT.

If ever your shoes need polishing... I am humbled.

:D : disclaimer alert

Spoons
2009-Oct-30, 01:07 PM
My malnourished vegan side (or as I call him, Evil Spoons) is in a tiffy.

<If you think this is thread-worthy I'll make it so, but as an airy fairy nanothought I wondered about the proportions>
I'm interested how disgusting people think vegemite is though - that's the only way I ever eat those things.

Buttercup
2009-Oct-30, 01:29 PM
Allergic to chocolate?! Your life must be hell.

A pure and light vanilla is as good. :D And besides maple, there's also butterscotch. :) Equally delectable in their own rights.


Wot?!---he dared return without a replacement donut?
The man is clearly suicidal!

He's gutsy in the strangest ways. :rolleyes:


Was there a prenuptual agreement? Did he enter the marriage with this doughnut?

No. I've learned though. If there's ever a next marriage (doubtful; this one is fine otherwise) there will be a prenup about maple-iced donuts or there's no wedding day. Period.


I'm concerned - I've seen civilisations toppled over less.

:lol:


I left my last partner when she ate the last rice cake.

I can sympathize. ;)

Spoons
2009-Oct-30, 01:34 PM
I'm sure if you made the concern known he will be careful not to do it again.

Trebuchet
2009-Oct-30, 06:40 PM
Buttercup, I hereby cede to you all the maple bars that come my way in the future. I just don't care for them much, nor, for that matter, maple sugar or genuine maple syrup. Obtaining possession of the bars is up to you, of course.

Buttercup
2009-Oct-30, 07:14 PM
Thank you Trebuchet! :) I'll gladly take them.

dwnielsen
2009-Nov-01, 04:06 PM
What are all these special donuts, and why do I not remember ever having had one?
Donations gladly accepted. :)

cosmocrazy
2009-Nov-02, 09:43 PM
I'm sure if you made the concern known he will be careful not to do it again.

Oh I reckon it was made very clear! a woman can display her emotions strongly just by facial expressions and body language. I'm sure BC's husband was well aware something had upset her, whether he clicked in straight away what it was is the question.. :)

HenrikOlsen
2009-Nov-02, 09:52 PM
Methods includes The Folding of the Arms, The Tapping of the Foot and The Pursing of the Lips. It seldom has to escalate all the way to Demanding an Explanation.

SolusLupus
2009-Nov-02, 09:54 PM
Ahh... but planting mousetraps inside jelly rolls is more fun...

Personally, I'd take a rubber eraser and slide it inside. Not enough to affect the taste of the donut for myself, but enough to let him know not to do that.

cosmocrazy
2009-Nov-02, 11:04 PM
Methods includes The Folding of the Arms, The Tapping of the Foot and The Pursing of the Lips. It seldom has to escalate all the way to Demanding an Explanation.

Somehow I get the feeling you have been there done that and got the t-shirt.:whistle:

Well put!

Spoons
2009-Nov-03, 01:17 AM
Well, as Henrik pointed out, taking flight suggests he knew all too well what he'd done.

I think I.E. Morgan has some advice (http://www.sffworld.com/community/poem/362.html) for you.

HenrikOlsen
2009-Nov-03, 07:13 AM
Somehow I get the feeling you have been there done that and got the t-shirt.:whistle:
Being credited with invention I have to admit instead to plagiarism.
It's paraphrased from a minor running gag in Pratchett's Wintersmith.


“They want tae get married?”
“A lot o’ them do, aye,” said Billy.
“So there’s nae more drinkin’, stealin’, an’ fightin’?”
“Hey, ah’m still allowed some drinkin’ an’ stealin’ an’ fightin’!” said Rob Anybody.
“Aye, Rob, but we canna help noticin’ ye also have tae do the Explainin’, too,” said Daft Wullie.
There was a general nodding from the crowd. To Feegles, Explaining was a dark art. It was just so hard.
“Like, when we come back from drinkin’, stealin’, an’ fightin’, Jeannie gives ye the Pursin’ o’ the Lips,” Daft Wullie went on.
A moan went up from all the Feegles: “Ooooh, save us from the Pursin’ o’ the Lips!”
“An’ there’s the Foldin’ o’ the Arms,” said Wullie, because he was even scaring himself.
“Oooooh, waily, waily, waily, the Foldin’ o’ the Arms!” the Feegles cried, tearing at their hair.
“Not tae mention the Tappin’ o’ the Feets….” Wullie stopped, not wanting to mention the Tappin’ o’ the Feets.
“Aargh! Oooooh! No’ the Tappin’ o’ the Feets!” Some of the Feegles started to bang their heads on trees.
“Aye, aye, aye, BUT,” said Rob Anybody desperately, “what youse dinna ken is that this is part o’ the hiddlins o’ husbandry.”
Feegles looked at one another. There was silence except for the creak of a small tree as it fell over.
“We never heard o’ any sich thing, Rob,” said Big Yan.
“Well, an’ ah’m no’ surprised! Who’d tell ye? Ye ain’t married! Ye dinna get the po-et-ic symmi-tree o’ the whole thing. Gather roound ’til I tell ye….”
Rob looked around to see if anyone apart from about five hundred Feegles was watching him, and went on: “See…first ye get the drinkin’ an’ the fightin’ an’ the stealin’, okay. An’ when you get back tae the mound, it’s time for the Tappin’ o’ the Feets—”
“Ooooooo!”
“—an’ the Foldin’ o’ the Arms—”
“Aaaargh!”
“—an’, o’ course, the Pursin’ o’ the Lips an’ will ye scunners knock it off wi’ the groanin’ before I starts bangin’ heids together! Right?”
All the Feegles fell silent, except for one:
“Oh, waily, waily, waily! Ohhhhhhh! Aaarrgh! The Pursin’…o’…the…”
He stopped and looked around in embarrassment.
“Daft Wullie?” said Rob Anybody with icy patience.
“Aye, Rob?”
“Ye ken I told yez there wuz times ye should listen to whut I was sayin’?”
“Aye, Rob?”
“That wuz one o’ them times.”
Daft Wullie hung his head. “Sorry, Rob.”
“Aye! Now, where wuz I…Oh, aye…we get the lips an’ the arms an’ the feets, okay? An’ then—”
“It’s time for the Explainin’!” said Daft Wullie.
“Aye!” snapped Rob Anybody. “Any one o’ youse mudlins want to be the one who dares tae do the Explainin’?”
He looked around.
The Feegles shuffled backward.
“Wi’ the kelda a-pursin’ an’ a-foldin’ an’ a-tappin’,” Rob went on in a voice of Doom, “an’ that look in her bonny eye that says: ‘This Explanation had better be really guid’? Well? Do ye?”
By now Feegles were crying and chewing the edges of their kilts in terror.
“No, Rob,” they murmured.

pghnative
2009-Nov-03, 11:36 AM
Methods includes The Folding of the Arms, The Tapping of the Foot and The Pursing of the Lips. It seldom has to escalate all the way to Demanding an Explanation.There's also that four letter F-word:

FINE!

(When said with an explanation point, things are never fine.)

Trebuchet
2009-Nov-03, 02:55 PM
Or from Gallagher:
When she says, "Ohhh, nothing", you know it's "Ohhh, something." It's up to you to figure out what.

closetgeek
2009-Nov-05, 02:16 PM
To be honest, I'm a bit surprised at the number of doughnuts being consumed all in one morning. (Not to mention how they're spelled.)

Not exactly what one calls health food.

Well that depends, if it's from Dunkin Donuts, it's a donut. If it's from anywhere else; doughnut.

As for the amount of donuts/doughnuts consumed, well:
You can live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that make you want to live to be a hundred.
Woody Allen

Buttercup
2009-Nov-05, 03:23 PM
Oh I reckon it was made very clear! a woman can display her emotions strongly just by facial expressions and body language. I'm sure BC's husband was well aware something had upset her, whether he clicked in straight away what it was is the question.. :)

With me it's flaring of the nostrils, tensing of the shoulder muscles, glinting of the eyes, setting of the jaw. :p

CJSF
2009-Nov-05, 03:33 PM
Buttercup, you are blessed beyond compare with your marriage, that this is a serious issue for the two of you, even if you are jesting about it.

CJSF