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Thread: We don't need no stinkin' Untrue Facts! (!!!)

  1. #2701
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    A lunar mining machine is being developed
    to exploit the glittering gold veins that
    were seen in the Hyginus Rille area. The
    improved price of gold has given impetus
    to the project.

  2. #2702
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    The fall of the dollar as world reserve currency was halted this morning when Warren Buffet and Scrooge McDuck announced a joint venture to mine moon gold. Which moon was not specified.

  3. #2703
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    It all makes sense.
    Trigger warning - this post may contain information that some members disagree with, and is not suitable for a safe space like CQ.

  4. #2704
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    I often dream in Swedish Chef Swedish.

    (I oofftee dreem in Svedeesh Cheff Svedeesh. Bork, bork, bork.)
    At night the stars put on a show for free (Carole King)

    All moderation in purple - The rules

  5. #2705
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    What Swift means is he long had a desire
    to be a guest star on the old Muppet Show.
    A condition that applied to many people!

  6. #2706
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    I was on The Muppet Show.

    I was Nurse Janice.

  7. #2707
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    Here at Muppet Labs the future is being made today.

  8. #2708
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    To increase their usefulness to their customers, Doctor Phil and Judge Judy are going to trade jobs.

  9. #2709
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    Google was founded on this date in 1994 by two students from Stamford, Tang "Tom" Goo and Jeffrey Gull.
    At night the stars put on a show for free (Carole King)

    All moderation in purple - The rules

  10. #2710
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    After starting his career in Muppet Labs,
    Beaker eventually became Chief Secretary
    to the Treasury.

  11. #2711
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    Halitosis was named after one of its worst sufferers Hal Greenblat of Schenectady, NY.

  12. #2712
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    I just ate 2,014 pineapple cupcakes with strawberry frosting.

    For dessert I'm having 3 raw green beans.

  13. #2713
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    The pineapple is actually named for the botanist Professor Samuel Pine, who first described it in Western scientific literature in 1757.
    At night the stars put on a show for free (Carole King)

    All moderation in purple - The rules

  14. #2714
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    Quote Originally Posted by Swift View Post
    The pineapple is actually named for the botanist Professor Samuel Pine, who first described it in Western scientific literature in 1757.
    That was after his experiments with hybrids: What happens if you cross a pine tree with an apple tree?

  15. #2715
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    Grey squirrels like oakapples whereas
    red squirrels prefer pineapples.

  16. #2716
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    Quote Originally Posted by peteshimmon View Post
    Grey squirrels like oakapples whereas
    red squirrels prefer pineapples.


    I made an oakapple pie once. It turned out woody and dry.

    On a different note, Yahoo is reporting that all giraffes in the world have lost 24 inches of neck length.
    Dip me in ink and toss me to the Poets.

  17. #2717
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    Quote Originally Posted by Buttercup View Post
    On a different note, Yahoo is reporting that all giraffes in the world have lost 24 inches of neck length.
    I blame over-aggressive speculation in giraffe derivatives.
    At night the stars put on a show for free (Carole King)

    All moderation in purple - The rules

  18. #2718
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    Quote Originally Posted by Swift View Post
    I blame over-aggressive speculation in giraffe derivatives.
    Scientists have discovered it's an evolutionary adaptation due to low-flying airplanes.

  19. #2719
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    All Christmas Cards will have pre-paid
    envelopes to prevent unstamped cards
    being sent thinking the post will be kind.

    Cuz they arn't!

  20. #2720
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    I'm back from the Stratosphere!

    After Felix chickened out, I took it upon myself to do the jump!

    What an adventure it was!

    Now awaiting the press corps... *powders nose*

  21. #2721
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    The expression "powdering the nose" was first used by the ancient Egyptians, and described a desiccation defect during the mummification process.
    At night the stars put on a show for free (Carole King)

    All moderation in purple - The rules

  22. #2722
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    Later sailing ships were filled with cannon and the powder monkeys had a routine of ramming the gunpowder in linen bags, then the balls, often red hot and finally they carefully sprinkled black powder over the firing hole, - powdering the nose - then the officer would shout "Sneeze" and wave his kerchief. Such fun.

  23. #2723
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    Powdered nose is considered a delicacy in Upper Mongolia.
    "I'm planning to live forever. So far, that's working perfectly." Steven Wright

  24. #2724
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    Mexican-Russian engineer Juan Blastoff contributed so much to the early U.S. space program that his name was chanted before each launch.

  25. #2725
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    Buzz Aldrin named his sons 3, 2 and 1 -- in that order. He named his daughter Blastoff.

  26. #2726
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    Quote Originally Posted by FarmMarsNow View Post
    Buzz Aldrin named his sons 3, 2 and 1 -- in that order. He named his daughter Blastoff.
    The weird thing is that all four of his kids were born before the US space program even started.
    At night the stars put on a show for free (Carole King)

    All moderation in purple - The rules

  27. #2727
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    Quote Originally Posted by Chuck View Post
    To increase their usefulness to their customers, Doctor Phil and Judge Judy are going to trade jobs.
    Don't you have to have usefulness to increase it?
    "I'm planning to live forever. So far, that's working perfectly." Steven Wright

  28. #2728
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    All posts in the untrue-facts-thread contain untrue facts.
    Trigger warning - this post may contain information that some members disagree with, and is not suitable for a safe space like CQ.

  29. #2729
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    Schools in Japan decided to abolish school uniforms in 2013.

  30. #2730
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    Sales of cameras and video recording equipment have quadrupled in Japan, as consumers anticipate large crowds of naked school students on streets, buses, and trains, when school uniforms are abolished in 2013.
    Trigger warning - this post may contain information that some members disagree with, and is not suitable for a safe space like CQ.

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