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Thread: Really trivial stuff that amuses you...

  1. #9991
    This morning I friend posted an image of turkeys running away from her on a run, oh she is politician too, some part of my brain a joke is a brewing.
    Also for some twitter seems to focus on things that a just suppose to be part of the foreground or background and not show the picture I want.
    From the wilderness into the cosmos.
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  2. #9992
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    Quote Originally Posted by The Backroad Astronomer View Post
    This morning I friend posted an image of turkeys running away from her on a run, oh she is politician too, some part of my brain a joke is a brewing.
    Also for some twitter seems to focus on things that a just suppose to be part of the foreground or background and not show the picture I want.
    Long ago, circa 1967, I remember watching Johnny Carson's Tonight Show.

    As Thanksgiving was approaching, his first guest was a farmer who brought out an enormous turkey whom he’d raised for all to see. Lots of laughs.

    As a further stunt, Carson phones New York Governor Nelson Rockefeller and requests that this magnificent bird be pardoned rather than sacrificed for someone’s dinner. Ever a politician, Rockefeller says he doesn’t want to set any precedent, but agrees to pardon the subject.

    The next guest is Former Vice President Richard Nixon (who was just mounting his 1968 campaign for President). Nixon’s first comment is “You know, Johnny, in my time I’ve campaigned for a lot of turkeys, but this is the first time I’ve followed one.”

    Later on Nixon observed that the turkey pardon might come back to haunt his rival Rockefeller. “The way he’s doing, Rocky can’t even afford to have the turkey growers against him."

  3. #9993
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    Amuses me, but shouldn’t:
    The local TV news showed an SUV that drove into a pharmacy. The reporter said that “police are investigating the cause” as she stood behind the vehicle.

    It had a decal in the window that read “In loving memory of my wife of 47 years.” I thought to myself, that might be a clue.




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  4. #9994
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    We went to the Wooden Boat Festival. When we got home my wife gave me a little blue pill to take.




    It was Aleve, for my aching back.
    Cum catapultae proscriptae erunt tum soli proscript catapultas habebunt.

  5. #9995
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    A friend of mine was having a large dead tree removed from his property, and the tree workers were throwing a lot of sawdust into the air as they ran the wood through their chipper on the street. A woman came along in a bright red convertible, driving with the top down and "dressed to the nines" along with a fresh hairdo. When the sawdust started falling on her she became angry and asked the property owner whose property it was. He replied that it was his and she gave him some more flak. He responded with something like, "It could have been worse. It could have been a flock of birds."

  6. #9996
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    Somewhat related, where I used to live, we had numerous developments encroaching on farmland. Apparently, some folks moved there because they had idyllic ideas of what a farm is.

    One day, a homeowner visited a farmer of a friend, and asked if he could “farm” another day, as the plowing was getting dust in their new house.




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  7. #9997
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    We're not too far from working farms here, and they are also having housing developments put up near them. In fact, a friend of a friend raises cows, and some new homeowners in the area deal with the issues there better than others. Hint--don't put plants next to the fence that you don't want cows to investigate, if they grow tall enough.
    _____________________________________________
    Gillian

    "Now everyone was giving her that kind of look UFOlogists get when they suddenly say, 'Hey, if you shade your eyes you can see it is just a flock of geese after all.'"

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  8. #9998
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    A few years ago a family in such an upstart development had an outdoor wedding on their place, downwind of a farm where manure was being spread on the fields after spending the winter in a silo. My thought was, "That's tough. The farmer was there first, and is practicing good organic soil management, using recycled manure rather than harsh synthetic fertilizer."

  9. #9999
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    I reacted the same way when new homeowners in places foolishly built in the noise footprints around Dulles Airport tried to demand flight restrictions. The airport was there first by 40 years, and the land should have been zoned industrial, so the noise would not matter.

  10. #10000
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hornblower View Post
    I reacted the same way when new homeowners in places foolishly built in the noise footprints around Dulles Airport tried to demand flight restrictions. The airport was there first by 40 years, and the land should have been zoned industrial, so the noise would not matter.
    It is also like the people who build developments in formally rural areas and then complain about the wild animals (deer, bear, coyotes, etc.) that are in their yards.
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  11. #10001
    Some people around here have lived with the wildlife around for their entire lives but once and a while they get nervous if there a bear or bear related activity, or other animal activity.

    Many years ago a neighbor had cows and they got out, they ended up tasting various peoples plants and walking a neighbors freshly planted lawn.

    About a week ago we were coming home from a rip and stopped in a large town and you could tell it was farm country from the scent.
    From the wilderness into the cosmos.
    You can not be afraid of the wind, Enterprise: Broken Bow.
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  12. #10002
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    Simon is the Grand Old Man at the bus stop in the mornings--we've gotten a large influx of kindergartners in our complex this year, apparently, and I was able to impart wisdom to a couple of the new parents. (The bus is always late in the afternoon. If your kid misses it in the morning, just go across the street to the stop there.)
    _____________________________________________
    Gillian

    "Now everyone was giving her that kind of look UFOlogists get when they suddenly say, 'Hey, if you shade your eyes you can see it is just a flock of geese after all.'"

    "You can't erase icing."

    "I can't believe it doesn't work! I found it on the internet, man!"

  13. #10003
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gillianren View Post
    Simon is the Grand Old Man at the bus stop in the mornings--we've gotten a large influx of kindergartners in our complex this year, apparently, and I was able to impart wisdom to a couple of the new parents. (The bus is always late in the afternoon. If your kid misses it in the morning, just go across the street to the stop there.)
    That makes me happy!
    Cum catapultae proscriptae erunt tum soli proscript catapultas habebunt.

  14. #10004
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    The wife and I have been watching a series on HBO called "The Righteous Gemstones". Dark comedy focusing on a mega-church pastor's family.

    In a recent episode, the main character was studying some security footage for clues, and was using a magnifying glass to look more closely at his computer screen.

    Those of you who remember a certain moon hoax poster from way back in the original Bad Astronomy forum days might appreciate why it amused me so much.
    Sometimes you win, sometimes you learn

  15. #10005
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    Quote Originally Posted by Trebuchet View Post
    That makes me happy!
    We sent one of the kids and her mom across the street this morning, because Irene--who was already awake, and who I got dressed before Simon was done getting dressed--and I were headed back inside as they were headed out. The mom isn't always there in the afternoons--she has a tendency to remember things she has to do right before the bus gets there--and the little girl comes over to our house to wait.
    _____________________________________________
    Gillian

    "Now everyone was giving her that kind of look UFOlogists get when they suddenly say, 'Hey, if you shade your eyes you can see it is just a flock of geese after all.'"

    "You can't erase icing."

    "I can't believe it doesn't work! I found it on the internet, man!"

  16. #10006
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    I was expecting a package today via UPS. I clicked on the "Track Package" link in the email that they sent and it displayed the status and showed a map - with the truck on our short street. Just then I heard the delivery truck drive up outside. By the time I went downstairs and got the package the status had changed to "Delivered." Fun timing.

  17. #10007
    Here in Canada an election has been called, as for the last couple of elections I have signed up to work, but the website says there is no election, I take the person doing website hasn't been told yet.
    From the wilderness into the cosmos.
    You can not be afraid of the wind, Enterprise: Broken Bow.
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  18. #10008
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    My son signed up for the Air Force and has been filling out paperwork and doing odd things ever since.

    A week or two ago, he went for a psych evaluation at the air base. It took forever. A young enlisted man came out to the waiting room and told us: "You son's psychological evaluation is taking longer than expected. We'd like to apologize for the inconvenience."

    As he walked away he physically blanched. He turned back and walked up to my wife and said: "Ma'am, my apologies. What I meant to say was the line was very long and your son has been waiting for his evaluation to begin. I meant no disrespect. Please accept my apologies."
    Solfe

  19. #10009
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    Quote Originally Posted by Solfe View Post
    My son signed up for the Air Force and has been filling out paperwork and doing odd things ever since.

    A week or two ago, he went for a psych evaluation at the air base. It took forever. A young enlisted man came out to the waiting room and told us: "You son's psychological evaluation is taking longer than expected. We'd like to apologize for the inconvenience."

    As he walked away he physically blanched. He turned back and walked up to my wife and said: "Ma'am, my apologies. What I meant to say was the line was very long and your son has been waiting for his evaluation to begin. I meant no disrespect. Please accept my apologies."
    Given that you wrote he had been "doing odd things", I wasn't surprised his psych evaluation was taking longer than expected.
    I was wondering if you'd posted on the wrong thread.

    Grant Hutchison

  20. #10010
    Windows got an up date last night, everything that was open got closed, I think I saved most of it.
    From the wilderness into the cosmos.
    You can not be afraid of the wind, Enterprise: Broken Bow.
    https://davidsuniverse.wordpress.com/

  21. #10011
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    A near-fatal attack of greengrocer's apostrophe, in a local fairground:
    Click image for larger version. 

Name:	apostrophe.jpg 
Views:	44 
Size:	381.7 KB 
ID:	24525
    I wonder why they omitted an apostrophe on "stairs".

    Grant Hutchison

  22. #10012
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    Abuser's of Apostrophe's are one of my pet peeve's.
    Cum catapultae proscriptae erunt tum soli proscript catapultas habebunt.

  23. #10013
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    I've been watching the live feed of the Alaskan bears (which someone here brought to my/our attention). There's also a "channel" with African cameras and I'm now hooked on them.

    There is a camera at a manmade watering hole, with a hose running underground to supply the water. An elephant found the hose and pulled it out of the ground. The herd than took turns playing with the hose, holding it with their trunks to get a drink or to splash themselves and each other. Kids at play.

    At another watering hole the elephants played in the mud, throwing it on themselves and even wallowing in it. More kids at play.
    Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by ignorance or stupidity.
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  24. #10014
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    Wish I could have photographed this one.
    I drove along the road today behind a joiner's van. On the rear doors, along with contact details, the vehicle sported a silhouette of a joiner at work. A recognizable figure wearing a tool apron, bending forward over a workbench, wielding a hammer. On the workbench there is a thin rectangular object lying flat, which we assume is a piece of wood because it has a flat-headed nail protruding from its upper surface, which the joiner is about to strike with the hammer.

    So this guy's driving around advertising his skills using a picture that shows a man nailing a piece of wood to his own workbench.

    Grant Hutchison

  25. #10015
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    Quote Originally Posted by grant hutchison View Post
    Wish I could have photographed this one.
    I drove along the road today behind a joiner's van. On the rear doors, along with contact details, the vehicle sported a silhouette of a joiner at work. A recognizable figure wearing a tool apron, bending forward over a workbench, wielding a hammer. On the workbench there is a thin rectangular object lying flat, which we assume is a piece of wood because it has a flat-headed nail protruding from its upper surface, which the joiner is about to strike with the hammer.

    So this guy's driving around advertising his skills using a picture that shows a man nailing a piece of wood to his own workbench.

    Grant Hutchison
    Let he who has never accidentally nailed* a piece of wood to his bench cast the first stone.

    And don't ask about that mark on my dining room table!

    *or drilled
    I may have many faults, but being wrong ain't one of them. - Jimmy Hoffa

  26. #10016
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    Quote Originally Posted by grant hutchison View Post
    Wish I could have photographed this one.
    I drove along the road today behind a joiner's van. On the rear doors, along with contact details, the vehicle sported a silhouette of a joiner at work. A recognizable figure wearing a tool apron, bending forward over a workbench, wielding a hammer. On the workbench there is a thin rectangular object lying flat, which we assume is a piece of wood because it has a flat-headed nail protruding from its upper surface, which the joiner is about to strike with the hammer.

    So this guy's driving around advertising his skills using a picture that shows a man nailing a piece of wood to his own workbench.

    Grant Hutchison
    That reminds me of all of the art of smiths working at anvils that seem to have nothing on them.
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  27. #10017
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    Quote Originally Posted by KaiYeves View Post
    That reminds me of all of the art of smiths working at anvils that seem to have nothing on them.
    I assume they're all actually making an anvil. Someone has to do it.

    Then there are those people "chopping wood" by just hitting a tree-stump with an axe - someone did that for quite a while in the last season of Mr. Robot.

    Grant Hutchison

  28. #10018
    Quote Originally Posted by grant hutchison View Post
    I assume they're all actually making an anvil. Someone has to do it.

    Then there are those people "chopping wood" by just hitting a tree-stump with an axe - someone did that for quite a while in the last season of Mr. Robot.

    Grant Hutchison
    That kind of bugs me too most people who need wood split often just use a woodsplitter. I often think when done on TV it is fake anyway none of them seem to get the axe stuck it just straight thru.
    Here is what I use.
    https://twitter.com/DavidLPFairweat/...828352/photo/1
    From the wilderness into the cosmos.
    You can not be afraid of the wind, Enterprise: Broken Bow.
    https://davidsuniverse.wordpress.com/

  29. #10019
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    Quote Originally Posted by The Backroad Astronomer View Post
    That kind of bugs me too most people who need wood split often just use a woodsplitter. I often think when done on TV it is fake anyway none of them seem to get the axe stuck it just straight thru.
    Here is what I use.
    https://twitter.com/DavidLPFairweat/...828352/photo/1
    At my old house, I split wood for supplementary heating, and my (retired) neighbor heated his house with wood.
    He split considerably more than I did, but we both did it by hand. I suspect we had a warmer climate than Backroad Astronomer, though

    My neighbor used an axe, but I preferred a splitting maul (with fiberglass handle). I also had a wedge and sledge hammer handy, because, yeah, the maul would occasionally get stuck.

    The sound, smell, and satisfaction of hand-splitting wood can't be beat, but I can see the utility in a power splitter.
    My current house has a gas fireplace, which I find totally unsatisfying.
    I may have many faults, but being wrong ain't one of them. - Jimmy Hoffa

  30. #10020
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    Eating in a little Highland restaurant last night.
    When the server came to take our orders, my wife ordered a Caesar salad.
    "One Caesar," said the server, and turned to me: "Et tu, Brute?"

    After we'd laughed at the joke, I asked him how often that one actually worked for him.
    "Pretty often when I see a T-shirt like that," he said.
    Oh. I was wearing my WILL POWER shirt, with the Droeshout portrait of Shakespeare on it. Fish in a barrel, really.

    Grant Hutchison

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