Doctor: Tell me about your bowels.
Patient: A, E, I, O, U ...
Doctor: Do you ever take anything seriously?
Patient: Sometimes ... why?
Order of Kilopi
Doctor: Tell me about your bowels.
Patient: A, E, I, O, U ...
Doctor: Do you ever take anything seriously?
Patient: Sometimes ... why?
Last edited by DaveC426913; 2017-Feb-14 at 03:02 AM.
Member
What if someone wants to say something serious, but is concerned it might disrupt this thread. Should we have a thread for that?
Text messaging is a frivolous vanity feature, not something serious like vBulletin.
Order of Kilopi
Start one. Call it "When you don't want to tell a joke."Originally Posted by spare part
"I'm planning to live forever. So far, that's working perfectly." Steven Wright
Order of Kilopi
No call it 'when you have to say something but don't want disrupt the joke thread'
................................
Moderator
Or just start a thread about the side topic. I'm not sure we need an entire thread containing all possible side topics, as sometimes the side topic gets longer than the original thread.
(as opposed to jokes, which usually die out after a post or three)
Insert awesome title here
What do you call some bad astronomy that 15 years old?
Cosmoquest.
Order of Kilopi
Well, I get the compound adjective, but what's "tronomy"?
Order of Kilopi
I just Tweeted my phone # to Clive Barker.
I doubt he'll call but who knows??
Dip me in ink and toss me to the Poets.
Order of Kilopi
The science of slide trombones.
"I'm planning to live forever. So far, that's working perfectly." Steven Wright
Order of Kilopi
The difference between men and women in a nutshell.
A man is driving up a hill on a very narrow country road.
At the crest, he encounters a woman, driving up the hill from the opposite direction.
As they are about to pass, she rolls down her window, and yells: "Pig!"
So he rolls down his window and yells "Cow!"
On the way down the far side of the hill, he crashes into a pig.
Last edited by Jim; 2017-Feb-15 at 12:29 PM. Reason: language
Insert awesome title here
Does the woman crash into a dog?
Order of Kilopi
Where do the binary people go, to be corrected?
Room 5
................................
Order of Kilopi
Wow. The CQ software (or someone) edited my post to say "cow". It was, indeed, originally a female dog in heat.
No, the point of the joke is kind of lost with the change.
Order of Kilopi
Not entirely. "Cow" is not an uncommon insult to be directed towards a woman.
BTW, unless you're referring to a different word than the one I'm thinking of, it's just a female dog. Not specifically one that's in heat. Unless you modified it with an intensifying adjective, in which case you're lucky somebody changed it.
Sometimes you win, sometimes you learn
Order of Kilopi
In fact, that's the way I first heard the joke. Except a police car pulled out a mile down the road and stopped the guy for speeding.
What can I say? It was the 1970s.
Grant Hutchison
Order of Kilopi
Yeah, but IMO, the escalation of insult punctuates the man's over-the-top animosity.
“Explaining humor is a lot like dissecting a frog, you learn a lot in the process, but in the end you kill it.”
― Mark Twain
Moderator
Off-topic posts moved from this thread.
____________
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Order of Kilopi
Dr. Grant, did I tell you about the time I encountered to rather large British women on my morning walk? I asked;
"Excuse me, are you two ladies from Scotland?"
"Wales you idiot!"
"Oh, excuse me! Are you two whales from Scotland?"
And that's when I woke up in the hospital.
Time wasted having fun is not time wasted - Lennon
(John, not the other one.)
Moderator
Order of Kilopi
Can a Vampire own a Kia?
No because it has no soul.
From the wilderness into the cosmos.
You can not be afraid of the wind, Enterprise: Broken Bow.
https://davidsuniverse.wordpress.com/
Order of Kilopi
An oldie
C, EB, and G walk into a bar. The Bartender says "Sorry no minors."
Order of Kilopi
I am so going to the warm place if exist because when the new car arrived I had to test my mother, I see you got a soul.
From the wilderness into the cosmos.
You can not be afraid of the wind, Enterprise: Broken Bow.
https://davidsuniverse.wordpress.com/
Order of Kilopi
Why are quantum physicists bad lovers?
because when they when they know momentum they don't know the position and when they know the position they don't know momentum.
From the wilderness into the cosmos.
You can not be afraid of the wind, Enterprise: Broken Bow.
https://davidsuniverse.wordpress.com/
Order of Kilopi
I got a tier and a bit to re pile.
or a tier a bit.
From the wilderness into the cosmos.
You can not be afraid of the wind, Enterprise: Broken Bow.
https://davidsuniverse.wordpress.com/
Order of Kilopi
That's tierrible.
"I'm planning to live forever. So far, that's working perfectly." Steven Wright
Order of Kilopi
You me the tierror of comedy.
From the wilderness into the cosmos.
You can not be afraid of the wind, Enterprise: Broken Bow.
https://davidsuniverse.wordpress.com/
Order of Kilopi
Why do mail order stores hire astronomers to supervise their shipping departments?
Because they have experience observing craters.
Order of Kilopi
You know that diarrhea is hereditary.
You know it runs in your genes.
From the wilderness into the cosmos.
You can not be afraid of the wind, Enterprise: Broken Bow.
https://davidsuniverse.wordpress.com/
Order of Kilopi
What do you call a ghost chicken?
A poultrygeist.
From the wilderness into the cosmos.
You can not be afraid of the wind, Enterprise: Broken Bow.
https://davidsuniverse.wordpress.com/
Order of Kilopi
Why did the poultrygeist cross the road?
To get to The Other Side.
Dip me in ink and toss me to the Poets.
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