oh yeah, SimpliSafe home security products.
the commercial representative is a guy who admits, to being a thief? and not a reformed thief.
maybe they should show him in prison, lamenting that he was caught because of SimpliSafe.
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oh yeah, SimpliSafe home security products.
the commercial representative is a guy who admits, to being a thief? and not a reformed thief.
maybe they should show him in prison, lamenting that he was caught because of SimpliSafe.
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Originally Posted by Extravoice
Reminds me of Steve Martin's Non-Conformist Oath.
Order of Kilopi
He's called Robert Larson. Robert = Robber. Larson = Larceny. Cute, huh?
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Another security company claims that locking your credit report is not sufficient, and you need them to monitor other things, such as your personal info for sale on “the dark web”.
Okay, what am I supposed to do differently if they find it for sale?
I may have many faults, but being wrong ain't one of them. - Jimmy Hoffa
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I believe he spells it Robbert.
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Order of Kilopi
I just suffered through a TV commercial hawking a coin.
Most of the commercial talks about the most recent gold coin minted by the US government (maybe twenty years ago?) and how it is now very valuable.
They then, very smoothly, shift to talk about a replica coin they are selling. It looks just like the original, but is plated in 14 mg of pure gold. The"original" selling price was to be $50, but they will sell it to you for only $19.99.
A quick calculation indicates that the coin contains 85˘ worth of gold.
So buy today!
I may have many faults, but being wrong ain't one of them. - Jimmy Hoffa
Order of Kilopi
Ah, but the coin underneath is the real (replica of) treasure!
"I'm planning to live forever. So far, that's working perfectly." Steven Wright
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I just received the original and still ultimate king of marketing spin: the lottery. "With this ticket you win at least €2, guaranteed!". But the ticket is 3€? "You WIN at least 2€!". Oh, ok...
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A loudspeaker at the 99˘ Store said their associates would greet customers with a smile. I asked the checkstand girl how I could verify this. She had no answer. I guess they plug in the usual phases without bothering to think.
Order of Kilopi
As the Mafia goons said to the witness, "Service with a smile!"
"I'm planning to live forever. So far, that's working perfectly." Steven Wright
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I haven't been in a K-Mart in a long time but they always had a sign on the register that said "TYFSAK". "Thank You For Shopping At K-Mart."
If I had to work there I'd need a reminder too.
Cum catapultae proscriptae erunt tum soli proscript catapultas habebunt.
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How long have they done that? I don’t remember seeing it, and am wondering if they started after I stopped going there or if I just didn’t notice. In my area, nearby K-marts closed quite a few years ago, and there were similar/better options close by for years while they were still open.
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I probably haven't been in one in at least 20 years, Target (pronounced "tar-jzay") being a far more pleasant experience. It was therefore decades ago that I noticed the sign.
Cum catapultae proscriptae erunt tum soli proscript catapultas habebunt.
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