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Thread: Robert's Rules of Life -- What I've learned in 70 years.

  1. #1
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    Robert's Rules of Life -- What I've learned in 70 years.

    Don't ask questions if you're not going to like the answer and can't or won't do anything about it.

    Close family calls me Robert, some call me Rob, others call me Bob. It doesn't matter.

    Stop and pet the kitty.

    There is no such thing as sufficient clamps in any workshop.

    That battery is going to die at the worst possible time. Be prepared.

    If you're getting line drives, your sling is too long. If you're getting popups, your sling is too short. Or too long. Watch for the stall.

    There is almost no place on earth better than Yellowstone National Park.

    Stop and pet the other kitty, too.
    Cum catapultae proscriptae erunt tum soli proscript catapultas habebunt.

  2. #2
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    I've learned Hutchison's Laws:
    1) Never breathe anything that contains no oxygen
    2) Never drink anything that is more than 50% alcohol
    3) Never become airborne using any mode of transport that is not generating lift

    (My friends claim that there is a Hutchison's Zeroth Law: Never cut your own hair while drunk. But I don't seem to remember anything about that one.)

    Grant Hutchison

  3. #3
    Maybe there some overlap with this thread, Grant.
    https://forum.cosmoquest.org/showthr...rinking-thread
    From the wilderness into the cosmos.
    You can not be afraid of the wind, Enterprise: Broken Bow.
    https://davidsuniverse.wordpress.com/

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    Quote Originally Posted by The Backroad Astronomer View Post
    Maybe there some overlap with this thread, Grant.
    https://forum.cosmoquest.org/showthr...rinking-thread
    Yep, that was the joke alright.

    Grant Hutchison

  5. #5
    One rule of mine is don't get to attached to plans, someone will always make other plans for the exact same time.
    From the wilderness into the cosmos.
    You can not be afraid of the wind, Enterprise: Broken Bow.
    https://davidsuniverse.wordpress.com/

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    My rule of microwaves: If you can hear the food, it's hot enough.
    Cum catapultae proscriptae erunt tum soli proscript catapultas habebunt.

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    You might have to wait a long time; always take a source of amusement.

    Have a generous-sized bottle of water and a source of sugar with you. You might not need it, but having-and-not-needing is much better than the inverse.

    Carry a good multi-tool.

    Don’t get your news from channels where heads shout at each other; text-based from non-axe-grinding mainstream sources is best.

    Don’t pay very much for meals. They’re just going into the toilet tomorrow.
    Calm down, have some dip. - George Carlin

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    Any job worth doing is worth doing well.
    Corollary: Some jobs are not worth doing but you wind up being required to do them anyway.
    Cum catapultae proscriptae erunt tum soli proscript catapultas habebunt.

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    Hope for the best, expect the worst, usually its somewhere in the middle.

    I'm often blinded by simplicity.

    Accept you are average, modesty can be a useful attribute, nobody likes a big head.

    You can only ever do your best, sometimes your best isn't good enough, that's life.

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    If you haven't even bothered to read the instruction manual, don't ask me how to do it.

    If you're not sure a tool needs to be sharpened, it does.

    Measure twice, cut once...and on the waste side of the line.

    A tool's most important safety feature is located squarely between your ears. Keep it engaged.

    A fresh sheet of sandpaper is always cheaper than wasted effort.

    Don't mistake a stick up your butt for a spine. Spines are flexible.


    And not exactly a rule...

    I indulge only three vices in life: cigars, scotch, and lying about having only three vices.
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    Man is a tool-using animal. Nowhere do you find him without tools; without tools he is nothing, with tools he is all. ó Thomas Carlyle (1795-1881)

  11. #11
    Quote Originally Posted by PetersCreek View Post


    Don't mistake a stick up your butt for a spine. Spines are flexible.

    I know a few people who need to learn that.

    When you think you have a lot to do your brain will think this would be nice on completely different project.
    From the wilderness into the cosmos.
    You can not be afraid of the wind, Enterprise: Broken Bow.
    https://davidsuniverse.wordpress.com/

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    Quote Originally Posted by PetersCreek View Post
    If you haven't even bothered to read the instruction manual, don't ask me how to do it.

    If you're not sure a tool needs to be sharpened, it does.

    Measure twice, cut once...and on the waste side of the line.

    A tool's most important safety feature is located squarely between your ears. Keep it engaged.

    A fresh sheet of sandpaper is always cheaper than wasted effort.

    Don't mistake a stick up your butt for a spine. Spines are flexible.


    And not exactly a rule...

    I indulge only three vices in life: cigars, scotch, and lying about having only three vices.
    I have seen many a person learn from a very costly mistake when not correctly reading their tape measure and then not checking it a couple of times after! I used to teach my apprentices to measure to the millimetre then take a mental note of the nearest imperial whole number as a basic reference point. For example I had a fella who cut a very expensive kitchen work top short by 90mm he had misread the tape 2010mm when it should have been 2100mm. If he had taken note of the imperial scale on the tape the correct length would have been around 83" inches not around the 79" he had cut it by mistake. I find this mental note very useful and reassuring when measuring.

  13. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by PetersCreek View Post
    ... Measure twice, cut once...
    Of course, there's the tale of the carpenter who complained, "I've cut this same 2x4 three times now and it's STILL too short!"
    Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by ignorance or stupidity.
    Isaac Asimov

    You know, the very powerful and the very stupid have one thing in common. They donít alter their views to fit the facts. They alter the facts to fit their views.
    Doctor Who

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    Quote Originally Posted by grant hutchison View Post
    (My friends claim that there is a Hutchison's Zeroth Law: Never cut your own hair while drunk. But I don't seem to remember anything about that one.)
    Or while sober.

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    Quote Originally Posted by PetersCreek View Post
    Don't mistake a stick up your butt for a spine. Spines are flexible.[/I]
    That's a dandy!

    Before honor comes humility. (Proverb)

    When your stupidity strikes, remember “I think I can!”

    When overwhelmed, take a deep breath and Ctrl-Alt-Del.

    Look your little ones in the eye and make love a verb.

    Understand the question before answering. [This just won’t stick, dang it!]

    When financial complications arise, make files and a spreadsheet to find them.

    Don’t discount the objective when being opinionated; look how far science has come.

    Throw strikes.

    Essentially, all women are beautiful.

    Don’t touch the merchandise.

    A person’s strength is also their weakness; just add “too”
    We know time flies, we just can't see its wings.

  16. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by George View Post

    When financial complications arise, make files and a spreadsheet to find them.
    When the only tool you have is Excel, every problem looks like a spreadsheet.
    Cum catapultae proscriptae erunt tum soli proscript catapultas habebunt.

  17. #17
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    Oh, I usually know exactly where my financial complications come from. I don't have enough money!
    _____________________________________________
    Gillian

    "Now everyone was giving her that kind of look UFOlogists get when they suddenly say, 'Hey, if you shade your eyes you can see it is just a flock of geese after all.'"

    "You can't erase icing."

    "I can't believe it doesn't work! I found it on the internet, man!"

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    When my father passed away, we -- I have two brothers -- didn't inherit much of any money, but he had a lot of fingers in a lot of pies including all his ranch issues. His full filing cabinet next to my own, along with all the trust issues and problems with his CPA made life more miserable than it should have been. If I could have grown hair to give me something worth pulling-out, I might have done it. My mistake was to not list all his files, plus all the new ones I had to make, on a simple spreadsheet. My emotional frustration bogged me down for two years and my room was always a mess, especially with piles of paper work.

    Perhaps someone will see this and, under similar stress, will make the push to orgainize.
    We know time flies, we just can't see its wings.

  19. #19
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    Read.

    Act like an ancestor, not a descendant.

    Eyes on the road. Stay in the here and now.

    If you serve in the military, no one can give you crap about it later.

    A man's job is to do the housework, not help with it.

    Use your [redacted] turn signal, you [redacted] [redacted].

    The older you get, the more you become who you really are.

    Read.

    Avoid the appearance of evil. If you can't, at least make it look like you're kidding.

    Work is good. Never retire.

    Avoid the squirrel in the road, but if that doesn't work just remember that vultures have to eat, too.

    Love leads to a lot of very bad decisions and horrible mistakes. Make them. Learn and do better.

    Evil is real. Resist it or regret it.

    Being old is better than being young.

    Read.
    Last edited by PetersCreek; 2019-Jul-31 at 08:16 PM. Reason: Masked language

  20. #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by Roger E. Moore View Post
    Being old is better than being young.
    Oddly, I tend to favour the following viewpoint:
    A wasted youth is better by far than a wise and respected old age.

    M. Loaf (1993)
    Grant Hutchison

  21. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by grant hutchison View Post
    Oddly, I tend to favour the following viewpoint:Grant Hutchison:
    Quote Originally Posted by Meat Loaf
    A wasted youth is better by far than a wise and respected old age.

    M. Loaf (1993)
    He would have been about 46 with that quote. Who is it that said, "I hope I die before I get old."(?). I few in the band did depart earlier than normal, though perhaps not for a rocker.

    A related quote, I'm sure you know, worth noting:
    "There are old pilots
    There are bold pilots
    But there are no old bold pilots"
    We know time flies, we just can't see its wings.

  22. #22
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    Quote Originally Posted by George View Post
    He would have been about 46 with that quote.
    Wise beyond his years, then. I can say with some confidence that my wise and respected old age compares very poorly with the bits of my youth I worked hard at wasting.

    Grant Hutchison

  23. #23
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    Quote Originally Posted by Trebuchet View Post
    Any job worth doing is worth doing well.
    Corollary: Some jobs are not worth doing but you wind up being required to do them anyway.
    That's a tricky one, I was taught at school "any job that is worth doing is worth doing badly" The argument here is that experience is worth while even if you are not, and will never be, the best at it. One example is playing music on an instrument. Listen to any expert performance and witness the practice time and surely you give up. But then you miss the experience of doing it, possible performing at a modest level and the life time joy of playing even when it is not for an audience. Humans learn by doing and being a jack of all trades my be an insult but in life it's really useful. It also pays when having to commission work to have some idea of what is being done from a practical experience. Anther example is sailing a small boat. You can get enormous pleasure and excitiement without aspiring to winning races. We need people for whom being expert is the drive, we need to appreciate their honed skills, but we can all enjoy mucking along at a "good enough for jazz" level. That last quote was from years of HiFi development as it was called then, when most of the paying public just want "pop" music.
    sicut vis videre esto
    When we realize that patterns don't exist in the universe, they are a template that we hold to the universe to make sense of it, it all makes a lot more sense.
    Originally Posted by Ken G

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    As old as I am, you'd think I would have learned a lot more by now. If I had a choice between being smarter or wiser, I would rather be wiser. Wish me luck on that.

  25. #25
    When there is an opportunity for a great picture the batteries go dead.
    From the wilderness into the cosmos.
    You can not be afraid of the wind, Enterprise: Broken Bow.
    https://davidsuniverse.wordpress.com/

  26. #26
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    Quote Originally Posted by Trebuchet View Post
    ...

    Stop and pet the kitty.

    ...

    Stop and pet the other kitty, too.
    So, only two rules.

  27. #27
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    Quote Originally Posted by Roger E. Moore View Post
    As old as I am, you'd think I would have learned a lot more by now. If I had a choice between being smarter or wiser, I would rather be wiser. Wish me luck on that.
    In British English, at least, it's essentially impossible to become smarter, but pretty much everyone gets wiser. So you've chosen ... um ... wisely.

    Grant Hutchison

  28. #28
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    Quote Originally Posted by George View Post
    He would have been about 46 with that quote. Who is it that said, "I hope I die before I get old."(?). I few in the band did depart earlier than normal, though perhaps not for a rocker.
    ..."
    A recent song from Rob Thomas (of Matchbox Twenty) has in the chorus, "I'm not afraid of getting older. I'm one less day from dying young."

  29. #29
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    Quote Originally Posted by grant hutchison View Post
    Wise beyond his years, then. I can say with some confidence that my wise and respected old age compares very poorly with the bits of my youth I worked hard at wasting.
    If you're like me, then, you're in the bonus round.
    We know time flies, we just can't see its wings.

  30. #30
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    Quote Originally Posted by George View Post
    If you're like me, then, you're in the bonus round.
    I suppose that's possible, but I actually have no idea what you mean.

    Grant Hutchison

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