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Thread: Worthless superpowers

  1. #61
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    The ability to vulcanize rubber with the power of your mind.

  2. #62
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    The power to turn gold into lead, and diamonds into lumps of coal.
    "I'm planning to live forever. So far, that's working perfectly." Steven Wright

  3. #63
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    Only having enough psychic ability to know what shapes are on the cards. None left for crime-fighting.
    The greatest journey of all time, for all to see
    Every mission makes our dreams reality
    And our destiny begins with you and me
    Through all space and time, the achievement of mankind
    As we sail the sea of discovery, on heroes’ wings we fly!

  4. #64
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    The ability to know when the answer is "None of the above".

  5. #65
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    the ability to eat your own head

  6. #66
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    Mike Alexanderhas the ability to remember television commercials he saw almost fifty years ago with uncanny accuracy.

    And remember, "If it doesn't say Amana, it's not a Radarange."
    Last edited by mike alexander; 2007-Oct-11 at 07:12 PM. Reason: a 'b' mysteriously became an 'i' under my fingers

  7. #67
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    The ability to only speak fluent English and binary code.
    The greatest journey of all time, for all to see
    Every mission makes our dreams reality
    And our destiny begins with you and me
    Through all space and time, the achievement of mankind
    As we sail the sea of discovery, on heroes’ wings we fly!

  8. #68
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    The ability to quote every riff from MST3K.

    The ability to understand every obscure reference in MST3K.

    The ability to know what MST3K is!

  9. #69
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    On Earth, my skin recieves far less UV rays than I was exposed in the Vegan colony where I was born, making it impossible for me to be sunburned by Sol.
    The greatest journey of all time, for all to see
    Every mission makes our dreams reality
    And our destiny begins with you and me
    Through all space and time, the achievement of mankind
    As we sail the sea of discovery, on heroes’ wings we fly!

  10. #70
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    The ability to use my ears as a shroud!

  11. #71
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    I think a story where some heroes with gadgets and minimal powers like hypnotic suggestion or vantriloquism defeat a villian with stronger powers by clever thinking would be a good read.
    The greatest journey of all time, for all to see
    Every mission makes our dreams reality
    And our destiny begins with you and me
    Through all space and time, the achievement of mankind
    As we sail the sea of discovery, on heroes’ wings we fly!

  12. #72
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    I think the ability to average 40 post a day in the first month after registration is amazing.

  13. #73
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    Mostly, it's in these games.
    The greatest journey of all time, for all to see
    Every mission makes our dreams reality
    And our destiny begins with you and me
    Through all space and time, the achievement of mankind
    As we sail the sea of discovery, on heroes’ wings we fly!

  14. #74
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    ability to curdle milk
    Trigger warning - this post may contain information that some members disagree with, and is not suitable for a safe space like CQ.

  15. #75
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    I knew it. You do not sleep or work or play or eat Oh Kai? Are all Vegans like you? With that sunscreen skin you better watch your Vit D intake. But maybe on Vega only Vitamins V, E,G,& A are needed? I really need the worthless superpower of that knowledge.

  16. #76
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    I knew it. You do not sleep or work or play or eat Oh Kai? Are all Vegans like you? With that sunscreen skin you better watch your Vit D intake. But maybe on Vega only Vitamins V, E,G,& A are needed? I really need the worthless superpower of that knowledge.
    No, I have a cover to maintain and only go on BAUT after I return from school. I do my homework quickly. I have my own vitamins that I take before eating Earth food so that it doesn't harm me and gets broken down into the nutrients that I need.
    The greatest journey of all time, for all to see
    Every mission makes our dreams reality
    And our destiny begins with you and me
    Through all space and time, the achievement of mankind
    As we sail the sea of discovery, on heroes’ wings we fly!

  17. #77
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    The power to turn food into sand with the blink of your eye.

  18. #78
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    The power to turn food into sand with the blink of your eye.
    I can blink up to four times in one second, provided that I focus. Is that a super enough power to win the Randi Prize?
    The greatest journey of all time, for all to see
    Every mission makes our dreams reality
    And our destiny begins with you and me
    Through all space and time, the achievement of mankind
    As we sail the sea of discovery, on heroes’ wings we fly!

  19. #79
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    The ability to touch your ear with your elbow.

    this should be good

    A hoax believer with the ability to NOT use ad hom attacks when commenting on YouTube!

  20. #80
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    Quote Originally Posted by Grand_Lunar View Post
    A hoax believer with the ability to NOT use ad hom attacks when commenting on YouTube!
    No, the powers have to be worthless.
    "I'm planning to live forever. So far, that's working perfectly." Steven Wright

  21. #81
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    Quote Originally Posted by Swift View Post
    I sometimes call my wife Non-Sequitur Girl, with the ability to turn any conversation in a completely new direction. In her crime-fighting alter ego she uses it to confuse criminals.
    Mine has that power too, coupled with the uncanny use of pronouns during this time to send it from superpower to an art form. This can lead to immense confusion as the conversation will continue on for a paragraph or two with each side talking about something completely unrelated. Then minutes are wasted trying to untangle the conversation to figure out just who meant what about which topic.

    Put her and her sister together and I just leave. They know exactly what they're talking about even though nary a noun has been uttered for an hour and the topics change rapidly, I swear in mid-sentence even. I'm half convinced it's just a ruse to make me and the brother-in-law go insane and they don't have any more clue of what they're saying than we do.

  22. #82
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    The power to cause a person to do the macerena uncomtrollably when they read your posts.
    The greatest journey of all time, for all to see
    Every mission makes our dreams reality
    And our destiny begins with you and me
    Through all space and time, the achievement of mankind
    As we sail the sea of discovery, on heroes’ wings we fly!

  23. #83
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    Quote Originally Posted by Noclevername View Post
    No, the powers have to be worthless.
    Oh, quite right.


    The ability to see colors...in a grayscale image.

    The ability to decompress a JPEG image...with your mind!

    The ability to find a school of fish...but only when they are below 300 meters.

  24. #84
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    The power to look at the ocean and see if there are any shipwrecks under the water. You can't see if they have gold, just if they're there.
    The greatest journey of all time, for all to see
    Every mission makes our dreams reality
    And our destiny begins with you and me
    Through all space and time, the achievement of mankind
    As we sail the sea of discovery, on heroes’ wings we fly!

  25. #85
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    Quote Originally Posted by KaiYeves View Post
    The power to look at the ocean and see if there are any shipwrecks under the water. You can't see if they have gold, just if they're there.
    I'm not so sure that would be "worthless." I'd bet you could make some good money by hiring yourself out to salvagers and other people interested in finding shipwrecks.

    Nick

  26. #86
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    I'm not so sure that would be "worthless." I'd bet you could make some good money by hiring yourself out to salvagers and other people interested in finding shipwrecks.
    As a diver and archeologist, I'd like it, but I meant it was a useless power in combat.
    Power to change your hair color for five minutes.
    The greatest journey of all time, for all to see
    Every mission makes our dreams reality
    And our destiny begins with you and me
    Through all space and time, the achievement of mankind
    As we sail the sea of discovery, on heroes’ wings we fly!

  27. #87
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    The power to hear every mosquito within ten miles as if it were right there.
    "I'm planning to live forever. So far, that's working perfectly." Steven Wright

  28. #88
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    The power to know exactly how many days, hours, minutes and seconds it is until a mission blasts off, without consulting any sources.
    The greatest journey of all time, for all to see
    Every mission makes our dreams reality
    And our destiny begins with you and me
    Through all space and time, the achievement of mankind
    As we sail the sea of discovery, on heroes’ wings we fly!

  29. #89
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    Being able to resolve features of galaxies billions of lightyears away with your naked eye. It might not be useless, but it's definitely going to be more trouble than it's worth as far as living goes, I'll leave it to you to figure out why.

  30. #90
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    The power to constantly blare loud music that you can't control and can't turn off. (Bonus points-- and sympathy-- if it's only country music. )
    "I'm planning to live forever. So far, that's working perfectly." Steven Wright

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